From D.A. Carson’s Scandalous:
Lazarus’s sisters refer to their brother as “the one you love” (John 11:3), an expression that hints of all kinds of human relationships that Jesus had of which we know rather little. I do think, though, that it is one of the common features of those who become intimate with Jesus that they think of themselves not as those who love him particularly well but those who are particularly well loved by him. Thus, John, the writer of this Gospel, refers to himself as “the disciple whom Jesus loved” (13:23; 21:7, 20; cf. 20:2). Or Paul, referring to Jesus in an atonement passage, adds the clause “who loved me and gave himself up for me” (Gal. 2:20). Paul prays that the Ephesians “may have the power, together with the saints, to grasp how wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ, and to know this love that surpasses knowledge” (Eph. 3:18-19a). Those who draw really close to Jesus think of themselves, first and foremost, as those loved by him rather than those who profess their love for him (emphasis mine).
(HT: John Starke)